My Family.

To a person that was supposed to look after me,

I lived with you for practically my whole life. I was your baby sister, someone you used to take care of unconditionally and would tell those who troubled me about themselves. I recently realized that the nice things you've done for me in recent years was facilitated by only your guilt. My memories were suppressed for most of my life and I struggled with doing things I knew were wrong and could never figure out why. People would go to you and ask "What's wrong with your sister?" and you would say "I don't know," like a thing never happened. You took my innocence, my sanity, my faith in mankind, and my ability to have a normal life. For years I'd look myself in the mirror and hated everything that I saw. You cannot possibly imagine what you put me through. I am however proud to say that I'm not going to be angry anymore and I'm taking back the life I was supposed to live.

To my mother,

I know you still talk about it with me or him, but you're still my mother and I love you. Things would be so much easier if you could help me get through this, or anyone if anyone could help for that matter. I know that your inability to talk about it with me stems from generations of people in our family not talking about things like this. I'm breaking the cycle and refuse to live in the dark anymore because other people feel uncomfortable about. What about me? What about you? What about all the other women in our family living destructive lives because no one will say a damn thing about what goes in their households? Your faith is strong and I know our family can live happy fulfilled lives.

To others,

Don't be so quick to judge. Instead of beating down people that are obviously going through a lot, help build them up. I want to see our community flourish.

Hello FinallyStrong,

I'm just sorry that I wasn't able to respond to this sooner! I applaude your openess. It's so important that more of us speak up in an effort to break the cycle. I also think it's great you are able to show love for your mother despite her connection to your past. That is a true testament of growth and healing!