What is Amanae?

I started to read, What is Amanae? I did not know the word, but body touch was used on me during a class healing. Also, Rolfing helped remove alot of anger from my body. On the way home from a session, if I had had a gun, I would have shot everyone that crossed my path or so I felt.

This hands on touching was done by all men, if I remember correctly. They touched a spot and I hollered out: "Mama, help me!" It was not my adult voice, but that of a child.
Also, during the session, they hit a spot that it took all of them to hold me down, I had unbelievable strength. Of course, I was crying and in great distress.

I did not remember this session until I was eating a Mango in St. Croix, USVI years later where I was living at the time. I started to gag and I always wondered why I could not eat anything too soft or wet (example, I had to cook spaghetti wet for my family and dry for me).

When I thought about that cryout, I remembered, not the actual event, but that I was sexually abused by the young boy(s) babysitters my mother had for me. I was two or three years then. They were family friends, all I think turned out to be alcoholics and all are dead. But I probably was forced into oral sex, thus, why I find soft or wet foods repugnant.

When I was pregnant with my first child, the step-father to the boys told me, "I thought you were going to wait for me." I knew what he meant and again I told no one. The whole family died out. Most of my abusers are dead and the one living that I confronted does not have any recollection of what I speak and he was a priest who left to marry.

It is one of God's miracles that I have never stopped loving or wanting to be loved by a man. Hate would have surely taken me in another dirrection. I tried once to be mean person, but it does not wear well on my face or serve my body.

All my baby pictures have no smiles, I am just looking, wondering why, are all these people in my life abusing me one way or the other? I have been working on healing my little child ever since I learned these different modalities.

I wish all abused people would tell it as soon as it happens whether anyone believes you or not. Please don't carry it in silence like I did, it hurts you more.

I get disappoiinted sometimes that after all the work, I am surely better, but not where I want to be. I continue to pat myself on the back for what I have accomplished. You just never give up.

Thanks for the question, and thanks for sharing your personal experience Santacruz! Amanae is an emotional release technique. I strongly encourage each of you to Google it to find out more details on Amanae. There's an international association. However, just a word about emotional release techniques. They are ALL designed to release trauma. Therefore it is EXTREMELY, EXTREMELY important to have a support system (or person) in place to help you deal with any emotions that may be released after the session. Everyone's response to a treatment will be different...Recovery is not always an easy process. But, I challenge each of you to go to the next level of your healing (please see my last post on the "Challenge" for details. While you're online, Google some of the emotional release techniques I listed in that post. You will find lot's of information on what the techniques are, including examples and where to find practitioners...In the meantime, hang in there! Also, some of the techniqes are listed on the "Resource" page of the main Web site: www.blacksurvivors.org.