My Little Secret

I'm a 41yr old African American female who has had to endure sexual abuse at a young age. Growing up stuff like that was not spoken about in my home and hidden under the carpet. I did once tell my father who almost killed his sisters husband for violating me, but the problem is that it did not end there with him, it continued with others. I was only about 5 or 6. I'm not really sure why I was picked to be someone's sexual pleasure or whatever they received from violating me but it happned. I was a child and was preyed upon by sick uncles, and even my brother. Family friends and evenb the daycare providers son. So needless to say I have alot of memories. It has caused me to be kind of leery of everyone man or woman, and I was overly guarded when I had my kids to not allow them to stay in peoples homes or those home daycares because I always associated it with being molested. The sad part was I tried my hardest to be like a tom boy in hopes of know one touching me but it didn't matter they did. It did not help that all of the molesters were relatives. At 41 I have accepted what has happned to me and have learned not to allow IT to run or consume my life. I came here in hopes of talking to others who are or have gone through something similar. I know every story is different but in the end we all were victims. We did not ask for this but since it has happend we are not alone and be there to hold each others hands through what ever we are feeling. I now want to be that support system to those girls who like me were forbidden or are forbidden to talk and tell. I would like to offer my shoulder and ear to anyone who wants to overcome this and realize that it's not your fault. Please inbox me and know that you are not alone. If I can help another person to not feel alone as I felt then I have done my job. Thanks
Star