You will take this ride with me........................

Well, where do I start? Although this is the most difficult of all things, I am learning to forgive you. This is something that is a priority in order for me to get past this. I have been holding on to our past for 19 years and it is time for me to let it go. But first let me open your eyes to the life I have been living since escaping the mental and sexual torture you have subjected me to. Well, right after leaving home, I picked up where you left off. Abusing and misusing myself. Because of you I continue to be self-destructive, although not as much today as i was yesterday. I am addicted to sex, amongst other things. I keep my vices close. You have robbed me of my innocence introducing me to things that should have been kept from me, at that age. Because of you, I mastered the art of sex by the age of 10. Sleeping with men, mainly older, before my teenage years. You have stole soo much from me. My childhood, my esteem, my mother. She couldn't, and til this day, can not see nothing past you. I feel like you owe me so much, but I will not hold my breathe. I refuse to allow you to have control over me any longer. What happened to you? Who screwed up your head? Cuz, you sure as hell screwed mine. It will take some time to get my mind right, but believe me, I AM WORTH IT! As I work on myself, I will continue to pray for you. Lord only knows the turmoil you must be going through. I can only imagine. If I am going through it, I know for sure you are going through some sh*t. Like I said, I will contine to pray and learn how to forgive you (althoough this is extremely hard). This is a must in order for me to get past this mess you have passed on.

Thank you for walking into our lives and passing on to us what was passed on to you. PLease know that this vicious cycle stops with me.

PLease get help.